Eventually, if you get the right composition and learn to control it tactically to your advantage, you can start winning really difficult fights, where you are outnumbered 2 or 3 to one. Fights vs multiple fleets merged or fights vs fully upgraded battlestations with fleets supporting them. And these are winnable without extreme losses too.
That's what I enjoy the most about the game - it's hard to master but very rewarding once you learn good tactics and get to the next level.
One issue is there is no real tactics to this game other than big dirty alpha strikes and speed, it tells you this by only giving you 5 command points and the AI ignoring 90% of commands you give anyway. Winning is just being able to delete as many ships in the shortest amount of time so your fleet AI changes from playing passive to playing aggressive. If you fail to do this or otherwise don't the AI will stumble all over itself waiting for you to personally turn the tide before it will begin any kind of assault. It really narrows what ships you should even fly. You can use other ships but it's only going to draw the battle out for ages and incur extra losses. I don't really like flying SO Chaingun Hammerhead but if I don't then their frigates will always harass the life out of anything slower than it, dragging it to a corner where it turns into wasted deployments points.
Actual formations that could be set and locked would go a long way to improving how these battles play out. I would happily settle for 3 Escort variants, Frontal Escort for Monitors, Omens etc, Rear Escort to cover Onslaughts and Fank Escort for just about everything else.
A formation maker in the outfitting window would be a god send.
Sorry but I have to disagree - that's totally not my experience, perhaps we play the game differently.
Alpha strikes matter - yes, and speed too, but you certainly don't need SO speed to be in control.
I use location guard commands a lot and split my troops into many separate task groups 3-6 ships at a time and give them separate orders and fight from defensible points around bonus areas. This is usually enough to stop the zerg rush dead in its tracks and to control pressure and start picking off vulnerable ships in key areas.
I also start with 8 command points and get skills to regen them quicker. Most of my line ships are effective shieldtanks with high flux stats, I'm mostly using hightech and midline mix and lots of missiles and energy weapons. They soak damage, back off and vent it and cover each other effectively. The battles where I am heavily outnumbered drag on and I need high CR to win them, but eventually it turns out victorious with few losses if any. I never use SO on any of my ships, except for some early game fun.
I also never fly my ship and give it to the AI 100% of the time, because I don't have the time for this, using command points and observing the battle is far more important.