And what is the equivalence between "miss one good" and the goods I deposit? Is it also exponential, i.e. if they miss one food, it means 10 food used per month, while a lack of 2 foods would mean they want 100 ?
Depending on your colony's accessibility, it's possible for the implicit background traders to be unable to supply it fully, which results in various penalties based on just what you're short of. Accessibility is treated as being much higher if you've a different colony producing the goods your first colony needs, rather than having to ship from the Core, but this usually isn't necessary for, e.g., food, organics, other critical stuff, unless you've put your colony really far out, are at war with major factions, or your spaceport hasn't finished constructing yet. Building waystations and upgrading the spaceport to a megaport will increase accessibility; so will turning on Free Port, but that comes with its own issues.
Sometimes explicit, actually-extant trade fleets will show up at your colony; if they get blown up, you'll take a temporary penalty to the supply of whatever resources those fleets were bringing.
As to knowing exactly how much will be burned from the stockpiles to buy off those penalties... I don't think there's been much research, beyond "highly impractical to do for any resource the colony doesn't produce for itself." If your primary concern is the economic hit, I don't think burning stockpiles is net positive.
