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Author Topic: Faction / Mod Lore Feedback Thread  (Read 1505 times)

Erick Doe

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Faction / Mod Lore Feedback Thread
« on: September 11, 2014, 07:30:36 AM »

Faction / Mod Lore Feedback Thread
We have a thread dedicated to artwork and sprites, making it easy for modders to receive feedback on their graphical work. But what about our writing and fiction / faction / mod lore? Well, as such I've started this thread. Post here if you've got a draft that you'd like your fellow modders and community members to have a look at!

Don't be afraid to have their eager eyes pick apart every word you've written. I know I'm not! Not really. Be nice? Please? Help!


Rules:
-No off topic banter
-Feedback on artwork related to written lore is allowed
-Feedback on artwork unrelated to lore is NOT allowed
-Be critical, but also be polite. Remember, this is about providing feedback to fellow community members. Not to stomp their dreams and hopes into the ground.  ;)
« Last Edit: September 11, 2014, 07:32:08 AM by Erick Doe »
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Erick Doe

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Re: Faction / Mod Lore Feedback Thread
« Reply #1 on: September 11, 2014, 07:31:32 AM »

To break the ice:


Spoiler

Batavia Shipyards
"Each part of the Batavian coat of arms represents one of seven Houses." -Unnamed Post Collapse Scholar on the History of Batavia Shipyards

Brief History
The Batavia Shipyards (often referred to as just "Batavians" in the common tongue) are an independent organisation, similar to the Hansaetic League of the ancient Domain. Their focus lies in the acquisition of wealth through trade and the production of resources otherwise unavailable. The Batavia Shipyards originated as a diplomatic and mercantile pact between several merchant groups, each with their own little fleet of vessels, a wealth in credits and access to one or more privately owned docks or bases. By cycle 73 they were known as the "Consortium of Seven United Houses" (or CoSUH). From there on the organisation grew and cooperation between the separate mercantile entities became ever closer - until they fully merged in cycle 155 - and turned their privately owned docks into massive space stations. These imposing feats of engineering are known in our current cycle as "Shipyards".

Extended History
The Houseraad
The cycle is 72 post Collapse. Several small merchant factions vying for control of trade along the spacelanes in the Corvus and the Askonia systems meet to discuss embargoes and treaties at the Houseraad; a great meeting held once per new cycle. Each of these small factions shared a common ancestry, reaching far back to the days of the ancient Domain. They are House Brant, House Friel, House Grel, House Hol, House Lim, House Uter and House Zel - each in control of their own resources; including wealth, bases and ships. While normally at each other's troats in ruthless competition, this Houseraad was different. Petty politics and scheming had been put aside to discuss a common threat - possibly even a common cause.
With the scarcity of resources, piracy had become worse, and trade suffered. The houses sought to unite under a single banner to improve their chances of survival, while still maintaining a large deal of independence. Thus, with the coming of cycle 73 the Consortium of Seven United Houses was formed during the Houseraad of that cycle. Efforts were made to pool their resources and wealth to construct massive spacestations known as Shipyards - great hubs of trade and construction, where CoSUH merchants could safely ply their mercantile dreams. Where the united houses could dominate and outcompete other mercantile factions. Where they could construct new vessels serving their specific needs, and to improve and expand their merchant fleets.

Spoiler

Consortium of Seven United Houses
"Throughout history, especially since the Collapse, the names and knowledge of ancestral heritage had been bastardised and turned ever more obscure. These peoples used what knowledge they had of their history and ancestry to difine themselves, giving shape to their respective houses." -Unnamed Post Collapse Scholar on the History of Batavia Shipyards


House Brant
A great family that had arrived in Corvus over 200 cycles ago. House Brant formed after these settlers had founded the Brant Group, a small outfit geared to moving essential wares throughout the system. Slowly, their unarmed freighters turned into armed cargo vessels. As their wealth grew, so did their ordnance and the number of military grade escort ships that graced their convoys. House Brant was one of the houses that drafted the CoSUH plans for the 73th Houseraad. Which eventually gave shape to the Batavia Shipyards.


House Friel
Born from the ashes of the Friel-task Traders (Or FTT), House Friel became one of the more influential merchant groups in the Askonia system. Their ancestors arrived in Corvus 37 cycles before the Collapse. Then moved on to settle the Askonia system. The Friel-task Traders did well before the Houseraad of the 71st cycle. However, during that cycle things changed for the worse. The Friel were targetted by pirate elements that raided their convoys and sacked their facilities. They pleaded for help at the 73th Houseraad. Their desperate situation at the hands of the pirates served as a warning to the other houses and indirectly gave shape to the forming of the CoSUH.


House Grel
Powerful, wealthy and extremely greedy. The Grel did not do business easily. They shunned most outsiders, which is odd for a group that focusses mainly on trade. The Grel, however, only traded with exclusive clientele. Deals were rare, but also extremely profitable. Most Grel deals went through the other houses of the CoSUH. After they were absorbed into Batavia Shipyards, the Grel focussed on designing only the most expensive and delicate products. Their initial wealth contributed greatly to the rise of the Batavians. It is said that they made up at least 50% of the CoSUH's networth. Less well known are their origins. The Grel seemingly started out as innersystem pawnbrokers in the Corvus system, descendants of a once noble family.


House Hol
Records on the Hol are scarce. They made a name for themselves shortly after the Collapse as mercenaries and bounty hunters. What really made them stand out was their strict doctrine. While aimed at the acquisition of wealth, it forbode them from taking on unethical assignments. Soon the Hollist Space Militia (HSM) became known as knights in shining armour. Unusual, since records show us that they have a common ancestry with many of the more mercantile and ruthless houses that eventually made up the CoSUH and the Batavia Shipyards. The HSM were one of the foremost supporters of the CoSUH, demanding that the other houses would stand with House Friel. Even in our current cycle the descendents of the Hollists still make up the bulk of the Batavian spacemarines and military forces.


House Lim
The colonists that would later make up House Lim arrived shortly after the Brant family, mere years before the Collapse. They settled in the same system as the Brants did, but soon found that they could not compete with the Brant Group's merchant fleets. Outcompeted, instead they decided to settle in the Askonia system and founded Lightspeed Lim Inc. (LLI). The LLI was often at odds with the Friel-task Traders, but also found itself signing many treaties with them. Many deals were made between the two groups, for better or for worse. However, the Lim alone could not stop the pirate elements from ravaging the Friel assets. When the Houseraad of cycle 73 came about, the Lim proposed unity and cooperation between the houses. Perhaps out of compassion for the Friel. But more likely out of self interest, not wanting to share a fate similar to that of House Friel's.


House Uter
There is but one word to describe House Uter's history: Shipwrights. House Uter was given shape by the Uter shipbuilding family that settled in Corvus. While working with scarce few blueprints, the Uters managed to deal almost exclusively with the pre-CoSUH merchant houses. When the 73rd Houseraad arrived, House Uter saw its chance to really cash-in on shipbuilding within this union. As such they were eager to support the plans for a union between the seven mercantile houses.


House Zel
The Zel family arrived in the sector simultaneously with the Hol. The two share a common lineage. The Zel founded Zellic Enterprises during the early days before the Collapse. Zellic Enterprises endured up until the forming of the CoSUH. Not much else is known about this group. It is said that they mainly dealt in contrabant and served as a middleman in the loot acquired from the Hollist Space Militia's raids. House Zel remained under the radar and was also the poorest house in the CoSUH, following the ruined Friel, hardly making up 3% of the CoSUH's networth. This almost caused them to be expelled from the union by the Grel. Lacking business savvy, most trade went directly to the Grel; who made a greater profit on looted, salvaged and contrabant ware than House Zel could ever hope to acquire. This was the sole reason for the Grel to withdraw their initial call for Zel exclusion.

-----
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The Shipyards
By cycle 154 the first Shipyard in the Corvus system was completed. It was then decided in the Houseraad of 155 to fully merge all aspects of their respective houses under a new name: Batavia Shipyards.
With their new superstation complete, production grew exponentially and so did their fleets. Not only armed freighters cleared the docks, but so did ever larger military ships, including huge battleships and carriers. Batavia Shipyards quickly became a mercantile juggernaught with a navy strong enough to back its more monetary ambitions.
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« Last Edit: September 11, 2014, 07:57:01 AM by Erick Doe »
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ORMtnMan

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Re: Faction / Mod Lore Feedback Thread
« Reply #2 on: September 11, 2014, 09:11:44 AM »

Wow Erick,

Your lore is rich... makes mine look bland in comparison... other than minor misspellings or grammar I have nothing to really nitpick on.

Well, maybe you or others have ideas on how to spice this lore up. Or if there are any unclear points...

The Ashkurr Commonwealth

Pre-Collapse
Spoiler
The Ashkurr Commonwealth’s pre-collapse history is spotty at best. The only historical documents remaining are business records and newsletters from a company called Astral Defense Industries (ADI). According to the documents, ADI is (was?) a company that produced midline military equipment. The company was founded by Ethan Coolidge in cycle 2854 (ancients time). Ethan was the son of a co-owner of the company (of which the name is not listed) that designed the venerable Eagle which gets such ubiquitous use in current time.

The Ashkurr system was found by ADI prospectors sometime in cycle 2879. The planets of the system were rich with minerals and ripe for exploitation. The downside was the planets were barren and their atmospheres made it impossible for biological life to survive. Massive auto-factories were established and the Ashkurr system quickly became the production center for the company. The deficiency in food production was supplemented by a continual stream of supply fleets, while local food production was established in orbital food yards.
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Collapse
Spoiler
When the Gates ceased operating, operations continued as normal for a short while as it did in other sectors. Unfortunately, at the point the gates went dark, the local food infrastructure was incomplete and insufficient for the requirements of the population in the system. As the food and medical supplies dwindled and gates did not reopen panic spread through the population.

With the absence of any direction from the corporate leaders the population formed its own government, The People's Republic of Ashkurr. In an act of desperation, all the industrial production was nationalized by the regional government. The auto-factory production was refocused from military production to designing and producing civilian and hydroponic craft.
[close]

Post-Collapse
Spoiler
Once supplies and food production stabilized in the system, the government slowly released control of industry to enterprising companies. This decentralization shifted the government away from the communism born from need. This new government was more democratic and each planet was allowed their own government. The self governing plantes established the Ashkurr Commonwealth.

Not every planet was happy with the change and a splinter group calling themselves the New People’s Republic (NPR) took control of Ashkurr IV. The lack of inter-planet trade (due to the frayed relations between the two governments) and shoddy infrastructure on the planet of this new group forced them to resort to pirating and smuggling to maintain enough supplies. The previous brotherhood and relations (more often than not by blood among the leadership) of the residents of the Commonwealth and those of the NPR have prevented any more drastic action than space skirmishes between the two factions.

Around cycle 200 scouts from the other systems reached the Ashkurr system and contact was reestablished between the Commonwealth and the other domains of man. Trade was re-established and the Commonwealth entered the inter-galactic conflict shortly thereafter.
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Creator and lord of The Ashkurr Commonwealth

Sprite artist and designer for Naysmyth Armouries